Advance praise for First Love
“With First Love, Lisa Phillips has written an exceptionally sophisticated, nuanced mediation on the complexity of young romance in the age of social media, smart phones, social isolation, gender fluidity, #metoo, widely accessible porn, rising levels of depression—you name it. With a novel emphasis on feelings—both on the part of the adolescents’ and the adults’—she tracks the life cycle of first relationships, from crush to break-up, and the result is one of the best books I’ve ever read about both parenting and parenthood. Phillips provides a new vocabulary and navigational tools for this bewildering new terrain, and what a service that is; what an eye-opener her work is to read.”
About First Love
Today’s young people are beginning their love lives in a time of rapidly changing ideas and ideals about identity, commitment, sexuality, and consent. For parents, the new realities of teenage relationships can be both mystifying and daunting.
In First Love: Guiding Teens through Relationships and Heartbreak, Lisa A. Phillips chronicles the challenges today’s adolescents face as they navigate experiences of crushes, dating, and breakups—and the challenges adults face as they strive to provide guidance and support. Phillips sheds light on how the relationships teens have today are different from their parents’ generation, including their reliance on technology and social media, the rise of young people identifying as LGBTQ+, high rates of depression and anxiety, and consent consciousness. She provides concrete strategies and insights from experts and teens themselves on ways parents and other adults can help young people cope with the timeless issues of love and heartbreak.
“With real originality and a beautifully readable blend of science and storytelling, First Love explores the birth of our romantic lives. Rich in insight, it’s also packed with concrete advice for today’s parents, with special attention to those eager to understand the Gen Z universe of gender fluidity and relationship redefinition. In making clear that the best preparation for dealing with our kids’ first loves is coming to terms with our own, Lisa A. Phillips creates a dual-generational portrait of love, longing and desire. It’s a sentimental education that will stay with you long after you finish reading.”
“As parents we fuss a lot about how to have the ‘sex talk’ with our kids, but we fuss far less about a topic that is certainly just as important: how to talk to our teens about romantic love and, specifically, about the riptides of first love. Lisa Phillips deftly guides us through these waters. There is so much that is important and useful about this engaging, insightful book.”
“Adolescent romantic relationships are far from frivolous, and Lisa Phillips is a trustworthy and steady voice, readying parents to be the safe and present allies that teens need as they venture into dating. First Love brings alive how our teens experience and are shaped by romantic love, and serves as a validating and educational resource for parents looking to support their children (and themselves) through their adolescents’ relationships. This book belongs on the bookshelf of every parent.”
“Much has been written for parents about how to talk to their teens about sex. But surprisingly less has been written about how to talk to teens about love—which, after all, is the more important of the two. First Love fills this gap with insight and compassion for parents and teenagers alike.”
“First Love is a wonderfully written, informative book that is filled with great real-life stories and infused with relevant science and evidence-based data. It’s easy to read and relate to. It addresses issues that are central to teen relationships, and it does so with both intellect and compassion. It’s absolutely a must-read!”
About the Author
Lisa A. Phillips, author of the new book, First Love: Guiding Teens through Relationships and Heartbreak, has written about relationships, mental health, and teens for The New York Times, The Washington Post, Longreads, Psychology Today, Cosmopolitan, Salon, and other outlets. She teaches journalism and the popular “Love and Heartbreak” seminar at the State University of New York at New Paltz. She’s published two previous books: Unrequited: The Thinking Woman’s Guide to Romantic Obsession and Public Radio: Behind the Voices. Phillips began her journalism career in public radio, working for radio stations in the Midwest and Northeast for more than a decade. She lives in New York's Hudson Valley.